Cops for Cancer (and healing)

Just sending out great big "hugs"and thank you's to the Cops for Cancer Tour de Valley.

This team is truly amazing and I just can't say enough about what their ride does for us. Now i know many of us have been effected by cancer and feel obligated or inspired to want to do more for the cause then just sit idolly by and pity the suffering but these guys and gals need a great big shout out. The thought of climbing on a bike and training for months to ride their bikes and raise funds and awareness during the unpredictable month of September is beyond my realm of possibility.... , doing a 5 k childrun once a year and draggin my butt through it is about as physical as i can get for the cause, but they do it, for what appears, nothing more than to fulfill the act of human kindness and empathy.
The fact that (i assume) most of them don't have a child effected by cancer can still get out there and give it their all and getting the community all pumped up for something that effects so few(children) is amazing. For them to honour our story and allow us the privlege to be part of their event is incredible and a very small token of our appreciation. If you do not know about Cops for Cancer then clearly we have not spoken in awhile because it is one of the causes so close to our heart, they embed the meaning of unselfishness and humility. Cops for Cancer raises awareness and money for kids living with cancer and for families/ siblings to attend Camp Goodtimes , our lifeline, i'm sure by now you know that.

Last year we were asked to share our story with the riders , perhaps for inspiration , they afforded us all the compassion and grace a grieving fmaily could stand. This year we were invited back. Our church (Cascade) hosted a dinner for them , it was a very surreal feeling to have such a representation of Ashleys life and struggle(cancer) hosted by the place that probably brought her the faith she need to face that struggle. It was a coming together of our worlds . our struggle and our faith right there in the same room. Our Pastor spoke about Ashley and how she touched the lives and atmosphere of those that dwelled with in those walls , we prayed for the riders and said grace and ate( food there is always so yummy...thanks chefs!!!) it was truly a blessing ... spiritually ,over the top, fullfilling , rich, cup runneth over sorta thing.

Darcy spoke about our second year in grief relayed our family's gratitude, and admiration for their will to touch suffering.( i let him frespeech this year , no pre written speech from me )My pastor called me up(UNPREPARED) to talk about Ashleys comfort bags,(which we are collecting supplies for) i don't think he gets how much i hate public speaking, i think he think he's getting me passed that, did ok i guess. Christy spoke from the heart conveying what Camp Goodtimes means to she and her sisters, that they call CGT "home", she read her Camp Goodtimes graduation speech and by the end i think they got it , i think they understood what we were triyn to say, that although they are riding for a cure, research, an end to kids cancer ,that this is one family that despite the loss , they are still riding for healing.Their emotion was overwhelming, their humility; endearing, their caring conversation and friendship; heartwarming. Although it was an emotional evening, Brittanny as usual, kept the evening light and comical, workin the crowd, making her way around the tables of cops , organizers , paramedics etc. keeping them in stitches ...yikes!!! makes me wonder what kinda family horror stories she was telling," Lord if you are in this room ...please grant this child discretion and i promise i wont give her anymore (humorous) material to work with." She even swindled one cop out of his jacket ...for keeps!!!!!

We sat at the table with Ross and Agnes, our "more than pastors" , our leaders, our friends, our rocks and a friend of theirs who had lost his child 10 years ago , for me that was another sacred moment . listening to someone who has made it to the other side , not over it , just living with it in faith, was meant to hear his words at that particular moment i think.

O.k...... for the really surreal moment ...hang on to your hats ...as we were sitting around socializing, a young rider came up to me and said " do you remember me " although i thought of her familiar i couldn't place her or maybe i was blocking things out of my mind.... but she said to me " well i am the paramedic on the team but i am actually a nurse....i was Ashleys nurse at ARH, I was on duty the morning Ashley passed".... I wish i could write better or i wish i was an artist to realte to you or find a better word/picture for "surreal" which i have over used already thus far but i really can't ....it made my body tingle , it made my heart skip a beat, maybe a hundred beats....it made me feel the strongest presence fill the space between she and i. Amy (thats her name) reminded me of the conversation she and i had while Ashley was in the hospital, we had talked then about what she wanted to do in her future nursing career, she said she remembered Ashley telling her what life at BCCH was like , how loud it was , how it was in need of repair etc, and then she said to me...." she was right cause thats where i am now , i am an oncology nurse at BCCH and Ashley really touched my life" , back to that laughing and crying at the same time thing again. She told us about the effect Ashley had on the staff at ARH and even at BCCH , i was so proud of Ashley all over again. We hugged her like she was our daughter and thanked her for sharing and for riding and just.... everything.

The night ended well , and we were back at it the next morning when the team made an awareness stop and pep rally thing at Britt's school , they called Britt up on stage and despite why she was up there she felt like royalty.They presented her with all their hotel goodies to donate to Ashleys bags, how cool they remembered. Have to say , not sure whether its age, emotion, PMS or just life, but again exhausted for days, sat on the couch all day Saturday watching reruns of just about everything under the sun, feeling a little lazy, guilty, compared to the riders out there busting their butts , i tell myself "leave it to the professionals"

Thank you everyone for your support and for journeying with us. Thank you to Cops for Cancer riders, organizers,commercial production staff, Cascade Community Church pastors(Ross, Agnes) office staff ,organizers , kitchen staff, chefs, guests, those who donated to our bottle drive (and my sister for counting) and those who donated to Ashleys comfort bags.... and all the angels always around us.

Peace,
Lori

Sunlight

Sunlight
by Lowey Family on Sunday, October 3, 2010 at 4:11pm


Laundry is stacked up to the ceiling at my house today.



I kept putting it off because i had run out of laundry soap and didn't get a chance to buy any this week , they were out of my brand at Walmart and as i reached for an alternative brand i remembered that it irritated some of our family members skin, so i reached for sunlight , i hadn't bought it in awhile , not sure why,so home i went and started the tedious task of sorting laundry ...yuk! as usual forgetting to remember how lucky i am to have machines that actually do the hard work and that im not rubbing the clothes together on a stone like Caroline Ingalls. I opened up the soap bottle and a strange feeling came over me i didn't know what it was but it completely surrounded me , the same feeling i had when i reached the soap off the shelf at the store , which is doubly wierd because i was thinkng about Sunlight detergent the other day ...yes, I know i'm weird if laundry detergent occupies my thoughts during the day but whatev...anyways after the gruelling task I went and lied down on my bed for a minute and as i lied on my hands i could smell the sunlight detergent close to my face...



Do you ever smile and cry a the same time?



I instantly got a wave of Ashley , and i mean a wave. it took over my whole being , I recalled her in my scents, its the same smell i hadn't smelled in so long , maybe I hadn't bought Sunlight since she was sick , but i suddenly remembered the smell of her skin, not just her clothes but her skin , i don't know why but it was that smell of a baby's bald head , maybe it reminded me of her clothes as a toddler ,or maybe it brought me back to a summer day when she ran freely in the yard with the smell of clean laundry drying on the line,of or maybe thats just what she smelled like ...pure sunlight, either way she entered my sense in a new way.... I cannot see her all the time but like a blind person perhaps my other sense of her have come clearer, today it was through the fragance of her "being" , sweet , clean , pure, and sunny...So glad I reached for Sunlight today.

(no i'm not sending this in as "my sunlight story" commercial.



Peace,

Lori